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Friday 7 March 2014

Productivity Has Taken A Back Seat

I have a paper due next Friday, an assignment due Thursday, plus I've been sick (and lazy) this week so I have a lot of schoolwork to catch up on.

I'd like to think I'm being productive, but that's absolutely not true.

I've got some stuff to write about (as always) but I'm trying to hold off on that until I can feel comfortable with my school situation.

Will be back!

Monday 3 March 2014

I Don't Like Whiney People

I have a roommate who is constantly complaining.

I do love her, but in recent months she has really started to bother me, to the point that I often hide in my room when she's in the living room, and I really have a hard time focusing when she talks to me.

I've always had anxiety about social interaction, and it wasn't until high school that I felt comfortable interacting with people at all.  I had a few friends in high school and in university made a few more.  This roommate is one of the first true friends I made in university and she knows I have this difficulty with social interaction, so we used to seem like the perfect pair.

I used to have to debrief a lot after socializing.  This was the friend who helped me through my first relationship with a boy and who helped me understand how to be an Autistic creature in this neurotypical world.  She was so supportive of me when I stressed about having few friends and being confused by relationships in general.  She was the one I turned to when I had troubles (and I had a lot) with my ex-boyfriend.

But now, I've noticed that she's been complaining.  Constantly.  She complains about being busy.  She complains that her bedroom is too small.  She complains about her family.  She complains about her boyfriend.  She complains about her other friends.  She complains about her schoolwork.  She complains about her skin.  She complains about her hair.  She complains about her body.  She complains about how she's tired, or hungry, or full, or cold... whatever feeling she is having, she talks about it continuously.

I feel like she's become really negative and it's hard to stay positive around her.  In fact, being around her just brings me really "down."

I have a hard time relating to people to begin with, and when you add that whiney quality to every interaction with a person, it makes it really hard for me to want to socialize, let alone to actually do it.

I want to make this friendship work.  I want this friend to be in my life for a long time.

But I don't like whiney people, and it's really hard to be her friend right now.